Another thing about Gary Busey other than his teeth that creeps me out

Well it’s official – my world has come crashing down. I can no longer access Perez Hilton on my work computer. How will I survive you ask? I don’t know. I just. Don’t. Know.

So this guy at work, I don’t know his name so let’s call him Red, finds this gift bag under his desk this morning. He reaches into it, pulls out a pair of pink, fuzzy handcuffs and asks the office if they belong to anyone. He’s holding them with his pinky finger as if they are just covered in gonorrhea and syphilis (which, who are we kidding, it’s a corporate London office so they probably are) and is giggling like a little girl. I’m not really sure what to do or say at this point because I’ve never even thought about being in this situation before, let alone actually experience it. In hindsight, I should have said something clever like “Actually, the janitor mentioned to me yesterday that her pair went missing” or “Those are mine! I like to be naughty while I create my pivot tables” or “Well, they’re certainly not Graham’s…his pair has a ketchup stain on it.” Instead I just sat there and giggled too, probably just as appropriate a reaction.

I was talking to this British lady on the phone today and she said “You’re a star” and “You’re an angel” all within a span of 15 seconds. You have no idea how special I felt when I hung up. I am invincible!!! (Or people are just really polite here.)

Okay, so maybe you know that I have an uncanny ability to win things. Some people think I’m just lucky. But really, I think it just boils down to the fact that I enter EVERY CONTEST KNOWN TO MAN. So why should it be any different just because I’m a million miles from home? (I like to say a million miles because I don’t actually know how many miles it is.) Today I won a pair of tickets to go to the NME Music Awards and Afterparty on Thursday night. Granted I’ve never even heard of this award show, but I have heard of some of the bands performing – The Kaiser Chiefs, My Chemical Romance, and Arctic Monkeys to name a few. Plus, they could have offered me tickets to the Whale Awards and I would have jumped out of my pants with excitement. Needless to say, I’m pumped for it! This will be my first awards show so I’m trying to plan my outfit accordingly. I think I’ll fit in pretty well if I wear a dress suit with pantyhose; it’ll be perfect if I get caught up in a mosh pit.