The annoying woman next to me clearing her throat every 20 seconds

Even in Scotland they have some pretty outrageous newspaper headlines…
- Accused too smelly to appear in court
- Man is banned for life from women and drink
- Scots now have greater choice of unspoilt places to go swimming
- Woman found living in wardrobe (Actually, you might have read about this one since it happened in China)

Here’s my favourite article from the Edinburgh paper, though…
- Women would race to meet Sir Sean
Sir Sean Connery has been named the celebrity women would most like to greet them as they finish a race, according to a cancer charity. The 77-year-old topped a poll of more than 1,000 women surveyed to find out which celebrities would motivate women to get to the finish line of the Cancer Research’s Race For Life.

If the London Transportation people rattle off a list of delays and suspensions for EVERY POSSIBLE UNDERGROUND LINE (signal failure on the Central line, a person under the train on the Circle line, a sick person on a train on the Jubilee line, a passenger alarm on the Victoria line, dismantling a World War II bomb on the Metropolitan line (this actually happened last week)), it doesn’t really make them look okay to follow it up by saying “There is good service on all other lines.”

Here is a story that I still have a hard time believing. I was sitting on the Tube reading my book on my morning commute when a 20-something man sat down beside me and proceeded to start reading The Metro. Normal so far. But then, out of the corner of my mind, I think I’ve seen him just put his finger in his mouth. But that can’t be right because seconds before that, I think I’ve seen him pick his nose. And certainly no male over the age of 4 would pick his nose and eat it. LET ALONE ON PUBLIC TRANSPORTATION SURROUNDED BY HORDES OF PEOPLE. So I chalk it up to the early hour and assume my brain isn’t functioning properly quite yet. But then it happens again! I am dumbfounded. I stop reading and stare at him furtively, all the while keeping my book open so that others don’t realize I am trying to watch a full grown man eat his boogers. And sure enough, he continues to do it. Finger up the nose, swirl and pick, finger out, finger in mouth, slurp. That’s right…there was audible slurping. But what is so unbelievable about this, moreso than the mere fact of the matter, is that he had no shame about the snot feast. He wasn’t even trying to hide it! At one point I thought that maybe I was on Candid Camera and that it was some kind of trick he was playing to see how many people would say something. But Allen Funt did not jump out with a boom microphone and I was left alone knowing this is a London memory that will stick with me forever.