Where am I even going with this thing?

I've only written about 6 entries since I got back from London. Apparently I was bored enough in London to write an amusing couple of paragraphs each day. And now that I'm back in Boston, I've been distracted with things like pissing cats, fixing my surround sound home theater, creating excel spreadsheets to adequately track overtime, joining a gym and figuring out how to make my arms look more toned without injuring myself, stealing the Wall Street Journal every day, buying awesome new Merrell shoes, remembering that Nip/Tuck is on at 10 pm every Tuesday night, and making trips to the bathroom at work with Theresa when I only have to go 50% of the time.

I miss writing. I don't miss stressing out that it's 11:30 pm and I haven't written my daily entry yet and oh my God I'm totally gonna let everyone down. But I do want to start writing again on a more consistent basis. I think it makes me a better person since, if I weren't writing, I'd just be watching another episode of the Food Network Challenge. And I swear...whoever does the program scheduling at the Food Network should be shot. Because the 7 pm timeslot is like, so amazingly precious, and they are fucking it up by putting a shitty show like that in there. Sure, I watch it. But not because I like it; I watch it because I need something to entertain me while I make my Kraft macaroni and cheese and the people on Wheel of Fortune are dolts.

Sometimes I make a deal with God in my head. I tell him that I will give him $1,000 if he can make my body instantly look like that Biggest Loser trainer, Jillian's, body. But then I realize that once I have that body, I would probably lose all its definition in about a week ('cause of, you know, candy). So I call off the deal.

Ted posed an interesting question at the Celtics game the other day. He asked if I would pay $1,000 to take a free throw shot. If I make it, I win $1,000,000. I can't remember if I said yes or no. My current answer would be 80% yes, 20% no. Which isn't really an answer at all.